Monday, May 5, 2008

Rules from a Texas Gentleman

Lyle Lovett talked to Esquire magazine recently and gave his rules for how to treat a woman...some I agree with...others not so much.

The first rule of manhood is that women are in charge. Give it up. Realize they're smarter and better looking.

i like the way you think Lyle!

A woman comes to a table and you're supposed to get up.

not so important to me. Sure it's nice...just not necessary

Never guess a woman's age. Never guess a woman's weight. Never even talk about weight in front of a woman. And never, ever ask a woman when she's due.

Amen to that! Short story...I was in the ladies room with a pregnant friend (who is very skinny even when pregnant) And she was saying that she was tired of strangers asking to touch her belly. Well this stranger comes out of one of the stalls and jokingly asks ME if she could touch MY belly. I had to say, um I'm not the one who's pregnant! Not a good day for me.

Women always go through the door first.

I'm down with that. Unless...I'm 50 feet away and you're already at the door holding it open for me so that I can go through first. That's just awkward...I feel like I have to run to get to the door to not hold you up. In this case, I can open the door for myself.

Never pass a woman a single bread roll, even if she says, "Don't pass them all over." Don't do it. Bring her the whole basket. Some things are a trick. I can hear the phone conversation later on with a girlfriend, "I asked him to pass a single roll. And he did!" It's a trap.

I couldn't care less about how many rolls Brian passes me. Throw me one...give me the basket and I'll pick. Who cares?!.

Never look in a woman's purse -- invited or uninvited. Especially invited. Just refuse. Bring her her purse, don't fish around in there. We don't know what's in there, and we don't want to know.

It's not a Mary Poppins aren't going to reach in and pull out a lamp. Yeah there might be makeup, some gum...maybe (gasp!) a hygiene product of some sorts. But it's not that scary.

So what do you think? What rules would you add or take away from the list?

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